The Derek Trotter Philosophy of Email Marketing. Chusty!
I lay giggling on the sofa on a Sunday afternoon. On the TV Del Boy is trying to flog at-home hair trimming combs from his suitcase at Peckham market.
I know the scene by heart. I could probably recite every line.
“Come closer, come closer. Because at these prices I can’t afford to deliver!”
Derek Edward Trotter is my most favourite fictional character of all time. I watch him when I’m sad, when I’m bored, when I’m ironing. This particular Sunday I’m watching him ‘just because’. I know that Del’s latest scam won’t work, that it will be years before he gets his big break.
If you haven’t seen this, or any other Only Fools episode, here’s a quick three-minute clip to get you up to speed on the wily ways of the infamous Derek Trotter….
Watching this sales pitch unfold, and the way people respond to him, I slowly realise something. Del is my business guru.
Del Boy, the greatest wheeler dealer of all time?!
Yes.
Now, yes, these days, if someone describes you as being a bit of a ‘Del Boy’ in business, it has negative connotations.
But I’m not advocating deception or scamming. I’m cheerleading the idea of grasping an opportunity with both hands.
And email marketing is a BIG opportunity.
The problem is most brands know that email marketing has the potential to lead to unbelievable business growth. But they don’t have Del’s brash business bravery.
Successful email marketing requires continual research, strategy, testing and analysing. And a ‘never say die’ attitude.
So, I introduce to you the Derek Trotter philosophy of email marketing…
“This time next year we’ll be millionaires!”
If Del Boy saw the return-on-investment of email marketing, he’d have Rodney logging on to the World Wide Web via hooky desktop before he could stutter a single protest. $44 for every dollar spent on an email marketing campaign? Well that’s a nice little earner.
Realistically? One email is unlikely to hit you the jackpot. But a well thought through strategy will lead to conversions, and therefore revenue.
“This is our big chance. He who dares, wins!”
Whilst regular, consistent newsletters are a fine thing, our attention spans are dwindling. In fact, it’s now estimated that you have only 8 seconds to grab your reader’s attention. You can’t leave readers trawling through the same-old content.
Push yourself out of your comfort zone or you’ll get lost in the inbox and lose the email marketing game. Segment out contacts and speak to their particular traits and interests. Trial new designs. Throw in an interactive element (such as a poll). Test, test, test and pivot…. “You’ve got to be dynamic my son!”
“Ask and it shall be given, that’s my motto”
When you treat email marketing as the two-way channel it is and communicate with your audience, you’ll be surprised at how much they’ll reveal.
Make it your goal to develop the gift of THEIR gab. Look at your previous email campaign reports. What copy did your audience engage with? What calls to action worked? Which didn’t? Go deeper if you need to… spend some time in the places your audience hangs out, read what they read (and write). Survey them. Take some time and interview them.
Cut what isn’t working and give them what they want. You know it makes sense.
“You know me, I’ll do anyone a favour… if the money’s right.”
You’re under no obligation to give a sign up discount. You don’t have to utilise offers at all if it doesn’t suit your brand, or if your profit margin doesn’t allow it, “A conscience is nice, but business is business.”
Del Boy stood out from the crowd because he wasn’t like every other market stall holder. You don’t have to offer the same as every other brand.
Get creative. What does your audience actually value? Free shipping, quizzes, exclusive invites and competitions are just a few options.
“My image is saying I’m going to the top flat out.... yours is saying I’m going back to bed cos I’m shagged out!!”
Derek Trotter lived on the 12th floor of Nelson Mandela House, in a council block apartment. He often couldn’t pay the rent, but he was always the best dressed man in the Nags Head pub. Why? Because he knew that his appearance built trust.
You don’t need a custom coded email template with all the bells and whistles. But what you do need to do is to treat email as an extension of your brand and structure your campaigns for easy reading.
Aim for simple, effective design. Keep font and colour use minimal. Only use images when they’re necessary. If your message relies on multiple images or gifs, make sure you size them correctly. Include plenty of white space to make your design pop.
When you spend time on your appearance and follow these simple rules, then you’ll knock ‘em bandy!
“Asking a Trotter if he knows anything about chandeliers is like asking Mr Kipling if he knows anything about cakes.”
When you’re sending the right content to the right people at the right time, you’ll see your reputation grow.
Email doesn’t just give you the best ROI of any marketing channel, it helps you build trust. Use it to showcase your industry knowledge and position yourself as the leader.
“There’s no point in running away. Running away only wears out your shoes.”
Del Boy failed. A lot. But he still got up every morning, shrugged his shoulders back and kept on trying, “I’ve always been an achiever. I’ve never actually achieved nothing, mind you, but I’ve always been in with a shout.“
If you’re not seeing the results you expected, or wanted, don’t give up. Go back to basics. Try a different strategy. Do the little things right.
Del didn’t find that antique fob watch worth £6.2 million in his garage in episode 61. Even then he never *really* stopped the dreaming, scheming, chasing and trying. There’s money in email, don’t stop now.
Right. Get your gold chains, monogrammed shirt and Gordon Gekko braces on and let’s get on down the market.
Lovely jubbly.
*Image via wallpaperaccess.com
